‘Twas the week before Christmas, when all through Korea
People were freezing, due to winds from Siberia; 
The passports were placed by the front door with care, 
In hopes that Leslie Teacher soon would not be there; 

The children were sniffling and picking their noses, 
I even had one kid throw up on his clothe-es! 
And me in my jacket, scarf, boots, mitts and cap, 
Thought: “It’s definitely colder than home now, what crap!” 

But decorations are up, I have holiday cheer! 
(And I wouldn’t turn down a good holiday beer.) 
I have a small tree, and some half-working lights, 
And a plan for avoiding a cold Christmas night; 

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, 
Like Dasher and Dancer, I’ll mount to the sky! 
I will sure miss seeing you all, that is true, 
But I will be travelling (’cause that’s what I do!) 

That’s right, while you’re trudging through snow that’s knee deep, 
I’ll be indulging in a massage in Siem Reap! (Sorry!) 
Now I may not be getting a new Christmas toy, 
But I’ll be saying “Happy New Year” from Hanoi! 

The whole time I’ll be thinking of family (and food), 
Of gingerbread, injera, the holiday mood; 
Guitar songs, board games, Secret Santa, and more, 
That special warmth you can’t get from a store. (Thanks, Grinch.)

Now perhaps I will see all of you soon on Skype, 
But in case there are technical difficulties, I’ll type: 
Though I’m not there person (which just isn’t right!), 
Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night! 

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*Last year was the third time I was away from home at Christmas. (I spent it in Siem Reap… I know, I know. Life is rough.) I was feeling inspired on a lunch break, and sent this out to my relatives.

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